For every house is built by someone, but the builder of all things is God. — Hebrews 3:4
I don’t fail very often any more, and it certainly isn’t because I’m great at everything I do. No, it is much more because in my seventh decade (!) I’m fairly aware of my limitations, and I stick to what I do well, or at least, what I’m pretty sure I won’t botch badly. I don’t try high diving or skateboarding or basketball; I don’t try to fix my own computer or my leaky roof; I don’t do electrical wiring or corporate taxes.
But as the laborer at the cottage, I’ve been trying some new things, with a modicum of success. My confidence was up (inflated perhaps) until this past weekend. I’ve been sanding the old windows that will go above the kitchen sink. I took out the glass — pane by pain (no blood though) — and then I scraped, sanded, and primed. Eventually it was time to replace the glass; the correct term is reglazing, and there used to be people who did this as a profession. They were called glaziers. They have my utmost respect.
I had visions of becoming the new DIY blog maven when I wrote the article, “How to Reglaze your Old Wood Double Hung Windows.” (Note that is not the title of this essay.) I took plenty of photos and even cleaned my fingernails.
A very good question to ask is: “Why would you be so sure you could do this?” Here are some random answers:
- I am fairly good at artistic endeavors: I can sew, knit, and make scrapbooks. I have made a couple of quilts. I can do passable graphics, and I’m really good at using scissors and coloring.
- I am particular and neat about my final work, tending toward perfectionism. (This could have been a warning sign…)
- I am very good at reading directions.
- I nailed the first part of the glazing process.
I took about twelve good photos from the first part of reglazing, which is called the back bead. In effect, it sets the glass in place and seals the inside. It is easy. Just make snakes of the glazing putty, push the glass in, put in the small metal points to hold the glass, and scrape off the excess putty. Yes, I nailed this first part.
The window is then turned over, so the outside is facing up. New putty snakes are made and pushed against the frame. Then the glazing tool is carefully held at the correct angle and pulled across the putty to make a crisp, even edge. No, I didn’t nail this second part.
I worked on making the putty smooth and even with the glazing tool for two hours. I kept reminding myself it was the outside of the window and hardly anyone would notice it. This was one pane; there are six panes per window and four windows = twenty-four panes. I pulled up the snakes and started again at least three times. I angled the glazing tool a hundred different ways. When the contractor husband came in from his own window project and asked how it was going, I’m not sure I answered him. I acted as if I were age 2 instead of my real advanced age number. He took the glazing tool from my hand and said, “Well, let’s see…”
When the going gets tough, the tough go take a nap. After two hours of napping and taking the longest, hottest shower I could stand, Voila, the contractor husband had the entire window finished. Technically, I am delighted that he could do it, and it looks great. I am glad to have a talented husband. The thing is, I’m supposed to do the unskilled labor and leave the jobs that only he can do (and there are a lot of those!) for him. I was supposed to be able to do this… This is a lesson in humility.
Oh, I know that Dr. Seuss had his first book (I Think That I Saw it on Mulberry Street) rejected multiple times. Madeleine L’Engle’s book A Wrinkle in Time (which later won the Newbery Award) was rejected twenty-nine times. It took Thomas Edison 10,000 times to get the filament right on his first light bulb…I KNOW ALL THAT! And these failure quotes that you are about to read — I’ve read them all a dozen times. They are platitudes; but they are also true.
“There are no secrets to success. It is the result of preparation, hard work, and learning from failure.” — Colin Powell
“Failure is only the opportunity to begin again, only this time more wisely.” — Henry Ford
“I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” — Thomas Edison
“If you have made mistakes, even serious ones, there is always another chance for you. What we call failure is not the falling down, but the staying down.” — Mary Pickford
“You build on failure. You use it as a stepping stone… You don’t try to forget the mistakes, but you don’t dwell on it. You don’t let it have any of your energy , or any of your time, or any of your space.” –Johnny Cash…and my personal favorite:
Yes, that’s what happened; I certainly lost my enthusiasm and never regained it. The ironic thing is that we had just had a discussion about fear of failure in church the day before. God asked Moses to lead His people out of slavery, and Moses politely declined at first. “Send someone else, God. I’m not really good at what you want me to do…”
We all fear failure, but as those quotes above point out, failure is always a lesson. It could be a lesson in hard work, or lack of preparation; it could be an opportunity for a second chance, or to encourage creativity and enthusiasm; it could be a lesson in losing gracefully or developing patience; or it simply could be to learn humility.
Moses finally accepted God’s plan for him and went to Pharaoh to ask for the people’s freedom. Seven times (at least) he went. Can you imagine what he was feeling that last time? “Oh no, Lord! Do I have to go again?” God chose Moses, so His strength would shine through Moses’ weaknesses and failures. Failure is not only all those lessons above; it is a God-given gift. Grace. So we won’t live proud. So we can be thankful for those failures. Our God can take those failures and lessons and use them for His glory. When we take on something we feel we can’t do, then God gets the glory, not us. Moses whined to God many times, finally saying, “…O Lord, please send someone else to do it.” (Exodus 4:13) (Sometimes I think that part of Moses’ “punishment” for whining was that, in turn, he had to listen to the Israelites whine in the desert for 40 years….)
“But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. He chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things–and the things that are not–to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before him.” — 1 Corinthians 1:27-29
Jesus chose twelve ragtag disciples who failed over and over again (taxing even Jesus’ patience!) yet look at what they became: Apostles, evangelists, missionaries to the world. Their successes were born of their failures, and of their willingness to trust Christ Jesus who is our wisdom, our righteousness, our holiness, our redemption… Therefore, let us boast only in Him, not ourselves (see 1 Corinthians 1:30-31).
Let’s go beyond the disciples though, and bring into your mind a picture of Jesus dying on the cross. His followers crushed by the seeming injustice, the awful atrocity and scandal, they scattered and hid from the oppressors, weeping and mourning that they could have been so wrong. By human thinking this was perhaps one of the most spectacular failures ever–they had trusted him and left everything for him, and now, their hero has suffered the shame of crucifixion.
God’s motif, His pattern for humanity, is to learn wisdom, success, holiness, righteousness, redemption through suffering, ignominy, and shame. He allowed it for His son; He will allow it for His children. Our efforts and our performance count little for Him; what He wants is our whole lives, our trust.
I’ve been reading Hebrews this week, and as I made my way through my journaling Bible, I came upon this that I’d written sometime in the past: “We can fail by not yielding to God control of our lives, by thinking we can and want to be masters of our own destiny. Our own effort and performance counts more to us than yielding to a God we cannot see.” And I’ll add today: When we humbly yield to Him, the creator and the one who never fails, think of what peace can be ours.
I’ve got three more windows to work on. I will certainly do the inside seal, but I’m not sure if I’ll try the outside bead of putty again. Perhaps I just need to practice…or perhaps it is a skill I won’t ever master, but I need to trust that God is teaching me to yield to Him in my failures. What looks like a failure on this side of earth, may be the exact opposite to Jesus.
In the meantime, I’ve ordered some cotton fabric printed with Granny Smith green apples, and I’m sewing kitchen shelf liners, because my pride is wounded after this extremely unsuccessful enterprise. I have confidence that I can do a sewing project.
Questions for thought:
- The Bible is filled with lessons of failure. Who are some of your favorites? There are always good reasons for God allowing us to fail…which one strikes your heart?
- I read of a missionary once (Gladys Aylward) whose calling to China was repeatedly thwarted (before she even got there…) and I thought, ‘Oh my goodness, if that had happened to me, I would have just assumed that God didn’t want me to go’. It’s likely I would have not persevered. Do you have a story of rewarded perseverance?
- What might God be calling you to do that is out of your comfort zone?What excuses do you use?
- Have you ever thought of your failures as something that could be looked at as a success? Turns the world upside down, doesn’t it? And that’s exactly what Jesus did. How can this help you rethink some things in your life?
- “I can do all things through Him who strengthens me” is from Philippians (4:13) and one of my favorite verses of encouragement. Do you have one? (Philippians 3:13 is another…)